After One Week into Classes This Freshman is Somehow Still Full of Life, and Hope

Cam Parrucci –

Meet Brandon Gilbert, incoming Business Administration freshman from Green Bay, Wisconsin.
Gilbert has already gotten a name for himself on campus as one of the few freshman who, after
the first week, and has yet to lose all hope.

“I mean, I know it’s the first week of classes and I already have 4 discussion posts, a quiz, 10
chapters of reading, and a paper due, but I’m in college now! This is great,” says Gilbert. “I don’t
see how everyone has lost hope so quickly, are they in the same classes as me?”

Gilbert’s cheery attitude has baffled his peers and professionals alike. Some maintain they are
happy for him, others find his enjoyment in life downright offensive. “Syllabus week doesn’t
mean what I thought it would mean,” says one other freshman. “I’ve already lost sleep, and my
daily 8 ams aren’t making this much easier. Seeing that guy on my floor walking around so
cheery and happy all the time is weird.”

Dr. Andres Olsten, a behavioral specialist, finds Gilbert’s positive attitude surprising, “Normally
you see the light dim after the first, or second day of classes, after the first real project or any
group work is assigned. Icebreakers also do the trick very quickly after the second or third time
around. Frankly, I’ve never seen a case of positivity as strong as his.”

While the future of Gilbert’s go-getting positivity streak remains strong, the future of this
student’s positivity remains murky. Stay tuned for any updates regarding this case only at
Stoutonia.