As spring break finally comes to close, UW-Stout students return to Menomonie after a week of vacationing, sleeping in, and questionable choices, ready to return to the hustle and bustle of the finishing weeks of the semester close in. For many students on campus, however, this means the start of the semester. Seniors on campus…
Cam “My Jokes Are a Cry for Help” Parrucci – Aries – “An apple a day keeps the doctor away!” does not actually involve catapults and your doctor’s home address, no matter how hard you want it to be the case. Taurus – There’s probably some sort of underlying message between you’re 300 songs long…
Cam “Playlist Junkie” Parrucci Aries – The snow still stuck behind the tires of your car since the first snow is really telling of your inability to let go of things. Get over things! Get rid of it! Taurus – As a history buff, the origins of things have always interested you. Too bad your…
Cam “Playlist Junkie” Parrucci – Amidst beer-case cardboard covering walls, mismatched chairs, and 3 DVDs on the wall shelf next to the TV, the décor of this UW-Stout college home living room might seem like your stereotypical men’s living room. For the longest time, this was the case. Taylor Manford, senior at UW-Stout, has gone…
Cam “I’m the Kind of Tired Sleep Won’t Fix” Parrucci In today’s world where young adults find extreme difficulties feeling comfortable around countless judgmental eyes, many take solace in the small victories of the day to day basis of being a college student. These small victories could be a number of things, ranging from getting…
Cam “I’m the Kind of Tired Sleep Won’t Fix” Parrucci Aries: You will never find true happiness. What are you going to do? Cry about it? Taurus: Despite others saying that your recent gluten-free stunt is annoying, the stars think it’s great you’ve managed to base your personality entirely on being gluten-free. Gemini: You often…
Cam “I Demand Attention” Parrucci – Layers of ice and snow have begun to coat nearly every street in the upper-Midwest, making visibility low, traction lower, and reducing speeds. Although this seems to happen annually in this part of the country, the people within the state seem unable to ever fully adapt to the tough…
Cam “I Demand Attention” Parrucci – Aquarius: You will be haunted by the ghosts of all of the socks you’ve lost doing laundry over the years. You’ll never get a good night’s sleep again! Pisces: It may be the middle of winter in Wisconsin, but bees will begin showing up in your room for the…
Alex Lutz – In a surprise turn of events, the Patriots are going to the Super Bowl. We were all very shocked and surprised to see them advance to the Super Bowl in overtime against the Chiefs. Yes, the team that always seems to find themselves in the Super Bowl has once again, ended up…
Evan (5 time hide and go seek champ) Thue – Well I usually start the day after pounding 8 red bulls and body slamming a refrigerator. I then head over to the gym where I run on the treadmill for 2 hours straight… with no breaks while staring at a picture of Freddie Prince Jr….
Cam “Roller Coaster Tycoon 2” Parrucci – At this point, what even is there to say? The world is on fire! Have you watched the news lately? Or rather, with our reader base of college students, have you checked Twitter lately? All the time there is stuff going on, political debates, weird memes, the world…
Bryce Parr – Teachers in the Menomonie Area School District report that students are agitated and excitable during morning classes after the closure of Rehab. “Classes used to be quiet and manageable. Students kept to themselves and didn’t cause any trouble. Now everyone is hootin’ and hollerin’ at each other like a bunch of wetland…
Logan Myhre – “Star Wars: The Last Jedi” has been a contentious film since its December 2017 release. Some critics praised it for breaking the “Star Wars” mold, while others felt that it did not accurately represent the “Star Wars” they grew up loving. University of Wisconsin-Stout sophomore Jared Wiley falls on the latter side…
Bryce Parr – A new generation of beanie-clad beer-drinkers have migrated to some of the areas surrounding the Red Cedar River. “They appear to be heavily concentrated around Zymurgy Brewing Company. and Brewery Nonic, and Lucette Brewing Company. We have been studying this herd since they arrived,” said population scientist Flatter Thurr. Scientists report that…
Audrey Tchaa – Milk. There are different types of milk. Dairy, almond, soy, cashew, strawberry, and everyone’s favorite: chocolate. Chuck Kowlick, a food science professor at University of Wisconsin-Stout recently discovered chocolate milk does, in fact, come from brown spotted cows. Kowlick goes into depth of how he made this discovery during his 15-year research…
Katie Schulzetenberg – As many are aware of, a couple of the buildings here on campus have been under extensive construction for a while now. North Hall is being completely reconstructed and as a result, students have been moved to Tainter Hall which had to be updated before they moved in. The Commons is being…
